Most women don’t have Confident Beauty because they compare themselves to other styles, but if you have ever been mistreated because of your appearance, you know that Image Issues are more complicated than that, because BEAUTY IS DANGEROUS.
Beauty is dangerous when it defeats us.
Maybe you HATE how you look because you compare your beauty to the models in the media and you feel you don’t measure up. Maybe men have been mean to you or taken advantage of your body. Perhaps it’s women who have mistreated you and tried to demean your beauty so that they feel better about themselves.
“I’ll never measure up to her.”
“I’ll never be all that he wants.”
“I’ll never be accepted.”
Beauty is dangerous when it defines us.
People are identified by their appearance, but beauty should never define a woman’s worth. Yet it does–especially when she is mistreated because of her appearance. One abused woman may feel she is valued only by how she looks, another may feel her beauty is her shame.
“I’m only desired for my body.”
“She hates me because I’m beautiful.”
Many women make a conscious, or often sub-conscious, decision that the safest way to deal with the danger of beauty is to HIDE. Perhaps you hide your body with baggy clothing, extra weight, or heavy tattoos, piercings and makeup. Or maybe you hide your heart with excessive talking, complaining or laughing.
Beauty is dangerous when it wounds us.
Whether you feel defeated or defined by your image, it is easy to get HUNG UP on trying to prove your worth. Many women strive to attain (or regain!) their beauty with products, services, surgeries, diets and gym memberships. While there is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself or looking your best, balance is really the key.
There’s really not much difference between a woman who is stressed and striving to look her best, all concerned about other people’s judgement and jealousy, and a woman who is full of shame, only concerned for others, without showing any respect for herself.
If we don’t like who we believe we are, then we have no desire to share who we really are.
Women who have Confident Beauty, however, know and like who they are. They don’t belittle themselves or intimidate others. Instead, they peacefully, responsibly take care of themselves and then forget about themselves so they can care about others.
If you know a woman with Confident Beauty–or one who is in need of some encouragement, would you share this blog with her?
As an author and speaker, Catrina’s passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, Catrina is the author of five books, including, Confident Beauty, Reflecting the One Who Made You with the Images in Your Mirror and in Your Soul Connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Linked In, Goodreads and consider having her speak at your next event. Visit http://catrinawelch.com for more information.