Category Archives: Kids

3 Steps to Love Yourself Better

Raising a child is no easy task.

As parents, we learn as we go, making mistakes, but doing the best we can. There’s things our parents did that we swore we would never do, yet we do them. There’s child-rearing techniques we thought were brilliant, that we learned were not. With each child we learn more; and then we become grandparents…

There are many benefits of grand-parenting over parenting. Personally, I feel the greatest part is in seeing the challenges and rewards from a different perspective.
Motherhood was a great portion of my personal identity. If my kids did well, I felt good about myself. If they were at risk or made poor choices, I felt like a failure. Raising my granddaughter is different.

The Value of Life-lessons

You know those times when something happens that beckons an intimate talk about life? I loved those special moments when I was rearing my own children. (Teaching is my passion.) I’m not so sure my kids loved those moments, though, because I realize now that I was putting too much pressure on them. When the opportunity arrises to teach my granddaughter, the life-lesson no longer feels urgent and demanding like it did with my kids because my own identity is no longer creating that pressure.

I am not afraid of my granddaughter’s mistakes, I know they will teach her better than I can, so she is allowed to mess up and I am allowed to enjoy witnessing her development. Her life-lessons are all about her success, not mine.

Teaching opportunities are precious, especially when we are not driven to fix, lecture or pressure the children in our lives.

The milk has spilled. I can yell, and she can cry, or we can simply clean it up together.

Life just taught her to be careful next time; I don’t need to.

When we realize that our panicked or controlling response could break a child’s character, the lesson is no longer, “Don’t do that!” If we want Confident Kids, we should not make them feel that their mistakes or messes are pitiful. Instead, by calmly cleaning up the mess with them, we are teaching them that our love is unconditional, which is really the greatest life-lesson we could ever teach.

Most of us mom’s understand this concept when it comes to handling “boo boos.” We ask to see what hurts, we kiss it, then we give it a pretty bandaid–even if it doesn’t need one. We instinctively know how to love a child through her hurts.

The Value of Validation

A kiss makes a boo boo “all better” because it gives validation to the pain.

Catrina welch

Perhaps it’s their tears that makes a boo-boo different from a mistake. Tears call to our momma-heart. It’s easy to console a child that is crying because that mistake doesn’t threaten our identity, it validates our worth.

Oh, how I wish I had used my “teaching opportunities” to love my children when they messed up–not only when they hurt. Now that they are grown, I see how they are just like me… and most other adults I know.

To take my FREE Image Identity Quiz

click here

Each of us respond differently, but our stressing and striving; our hating and hiding; our hangups and habits all give indication that our mistakes–or the fear of them–are still a Confidence Conflict. Our goal, of course, is to grow and mature in our responses, but for many of us, the fear of failure still shows up late in life.

Our children deserve more.

We can’t love anyone through their mistakes until we learn to love ourselves through our own.

I am far better at loving my granddaughter through her mistakes because I have learned to love myself through my own. I believe this is only possible because, by God’s grace, I have come to accept His unconditional love toward me.

How about you? How do you treat yourself when you mess up? If you are ready to let go of the fear of failure and begin to love yourself unconditionally, I encourage you to treat yourself as you would a child with a “boo boo”:

  1. Acknowledge what hurts. A wound that is not validated will not heal. God sees your pain, talk to Him about it.
  2. Accept a kiss. There is great value in being vulnerable enough to ask for help & healing. God loves when you come to Him like a little child.
  3. Put a pretty bandaid on it. It’s not about hiding the hurt, it’s about protecting it. Self care is an important part of maturing.

Each of us respond differently, but our stressing and striving; our hating and hiding; our hangups and habits all give indication that our mistakes–or the fear of them–are still major Confidence Conflicts.

CATRINA WELCH.COM/BLOG

As an author and speaker, my passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, I love to use my profession, along with my experiences and training as a Biblical life-coach to help others struggling. If you want to make difference, too, would you help share this blog and connect with me on Facebook, Twitter,  Pinterest, Linked In, Goodreads 

Favor is Deceitful – 3 Reasons Why

Faith, Kids, Life, , , ,

In honor of all the moms who have ever had a child turn on them and say, “I hate you!” I dedicate this blog to you.

God’s Word  is a lot like a fire hydrant: far more powerful than a refreshing drink of water. Perhaps this is what Jesus was alluding to when He told the Samaritan woman that, “those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.” in John 4:14

Let’s consider a small section of one verse for example.

Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. Proverbs 31:30

What does the Bible mean by, “charm is deceptive” (or “favor is deceitful”)?

I write a lot about Proverbs 31 Beauty, but now that my life is so involved with the deceitful world of addiction, I feel as though Continue reading Favor is Deceitful – 3 Reasons Why →








3 Tips for Handling Stay at Home Stress

Confidence, Kids, Life, Personal Style, , , , , ,

When I’m stressed,  I shut down and shut up.

The term tongue-tied may mean one thing to you, but to me, it is a perfect metaphor for how I feel when I am hurting. Even when I want to talk, the words are held captive. It doesn’t matter how quiet I am, however, my body language still  speaks loudly. Usually what it’s saying is,

“Leave me alone!”

And then I feel hurt when people avoid me–especially my husband, of course. I want others to read my mind not my face. I want them to ask and then wait (a really long time if necessary). Then I want them to judge my heart and not my confusing words. And I want them to be on my side, even if they have a completely opposing opinion.

I want, I want, I want.

When we are stressed, we are selfish.

Continue reading 3 Tips for Handling Stay at Home Stress →








Confidently Content

Confidence, Kids, Life, , , , , , , , ,

I grew up in an extravagant home on Cape Cod. When I was eleven, my family made a major change and pursued a secluded life in Maine. The adventure in the deep woods without the luxuries  we were used to reformed the character of each of us. Since we had nothing and knew no one, we cultivated tight and true relationships with one another. It was then that our faith became a true and important part of our lives.

I suppose, in a way, we were self-quarantined. Continue reading Confidently Content →








Finding Hope in Difficult Times

Confidence, Greif, Kids, Life, , , , ,

As a woman who has faced many storms in life, I am often asked, “If God is so good, why doesn’t He keep you from these difficult circumstances?” My answer is, “He is so good that He keeps me through them.”

Storms happen

Storm:  a disturbed state of environment, marked by significant disruptions to normal conditions. A center of low pressure w/ system of high pressure surrounding it. Opposing forces create stormy weather.

Why should any of us think that life is not fair because there is a significant disruption in our environment? In my experience, the more turbulent a storm, the deeper my faith has grown. 

There is a certain sweetness that builds when we face difficulties without casting blame or comparing circumstances.

Continue reading Finding Hope in Difficult Times →








Finding Balance When Life Changes

Confidence, Kids, Life, , , , ,

There is a balance between self-care and selfishness. Finding this balance will likely always be a challenge for most of us. I’m fifty-two years old, yet I, too, often feel the guilt of taking time for myself, especially now that I have slipped back into a self-sacrificing mommy mode. 

The “mommy-mode” of always putting others first is actually a beautiful thing when our heart is right.

To be “others-conscious” and put our family’s needs above our own is sweet and honorable. 

As long as our heart is.

Since my last post, I have been swept up in a tornado of drama and difficulties that tend to consume those of us who love an addict. The chaos and confusion isn’t new to me, but over the past years of my son’s addiction, I’ve found a way to continue with most aspects of my own life, no matter how out of control his was. This time, however, Continue reading Finding Balance When Life Changes →








New Children’s Book Equips Reader to Discuss Body Image Issues

Confidence, Kids, Life, Personal Style,

Image-Coach Reveals the 6 Clothing Personalities Through the Story of Katy’s Struggle with Self-esteem.  

CAPE COD, Ma. (May 22, 2019) – The next generation is struggling with serious body image issues and it’s imperative that we help them. Parents play a vital part in how children see themselves, but this sensitive topic is not easy  to discuss. With her latest book, author, Catrina Welch, taps her 30-plus years in the beauty industry to teach children confidence before their image becomes a life-long hang up. With a fun story, beautiful illustrations and suggested questions, this book unlocks a profound and pivotal message that could save your child from struggling with low self-esteem.

Like various flowers and trees, each boy and girl is beautiful and strong in their own way!

Journey with Katy as she lets go of comparison and learns to appreciate her individuality. As she finds the confidence to be who she was designed to be, so, too, will your child.  Continue reading New Children’s Book Equips Reader to Discuss Body Image Issues →








Raising Confident Kids

Confidence, Kids, Life, Personal Style, , , , , ,

With the first hospital visit, adults begin “speaking life” over your baby: 

She’s beautiful!

He’s so big!

As children grow, we naturally announce and affirm each progression of their development:

Look how he holds his head up.

She took her first step!

A healthy self-esteem is encouraged. 

Every child comes into this world with the need to know their worth and understand their purpose. Naturally, they find their answers (right or wrong) from their environment and the things we teach them.

If you have  a healthy self-image then you will be better equipped to help your children avoid Image Issues.

But not necessarily.  Continue reading Raising Confident Kids →








Is it Better to Be a Good Mother or a Grand Mother?

Confidence, Kids, Life, ,

With my last child leaving the nest  and a granddaughter on the way, I am often told that it is more fun to be a grandmother than a mom. 

Mothers typically find their identity in their relationships–especially with their children.

I’ve gained three important insights on motherhood:

  1. Moms have tremendous influence on the life of a child. Our kids lives are swayed by our faith, opinions, perspectives and words.  A child whose mom believes in her is more than a conqueror. A child whose mom condemns her will struggle with self-esteem.
  2. Moms have little power over the way they interpret that influence. Children will interpret your heart according to theirs. We say, “Clean your room, honey.” They may hear, “You’re such a slob!”  or “I need to do better to be loved.” It is vital that we understand our strengths and weaknesses and study them as individuals so that we can train them in the way they should go.
  3. It is very important that we know who we are and take our role seriously. There will be times when parenting is the hardest “career” on earth, changing jobs is not an option. No matter how difficult the relationship may get, we must continue to be the best mom we can be. As they grow up, we are no longer responsible for their choices, but we will always be responsible for how we treat them.

Our challenges with motherhood Continue reading Is it Better to Be a Good Mother or a Grand Mother? →








Finding Strength to Embrace your Challenge

Kids, Life, , ,

During the painful seasons of life, we are more sensitive than usual. Like a physical wound that stings with the slightest touch, emotional wounds may make us susceptible to road rage or irrational tears.

Difficult times also make us more sensitive to the spiritual realm.

Loosing my daughter was certainly one of the most difficult seasons of my life, but through that time I was abundantly blessed. 

One of my sweetest memories of Rebecca’s quick life is the moment when God laid this poem on my heart. It later became my first “publication” which was given out to the many people who came to her funeral. There were so many stories that came back to us about how the poem encouraged others that it made me want to continue writing. 

There is purpose in our pain. 

Rebecca’s death taught me that, as uncomfortable as it is to be vulnerable, it can be very rewarding. If you are suffering in anyway today, I encourage you to ask God to give you the strength to embrace your challenge and wisdom to learn from it. Great things are birthed in great pain. 

With that in mind, and in honor of the twentieth anniversary of my daughter’s “glory day,” I share with you God’s Comfort to Our Family and Friends (click here if picture is too small to read.)

“Don’t waist your tears, let them cleanse you. Don’t waist your pain, let it drive you to make a difference in the life of someone else.”

https://catrinawelch.com/blog/gods-comfort-to-our-family-and-friends/

***** 

As an author and speaker, my passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, I love to use my profession, along with my experiences and training as a Biblical life-coach to help others struggling. If you want to make difference, too, would you become  part of this movement and connect with me on Facebook, Twitter,  Pinterest, Linked In, Goodreads  or consider having me speak at your next event. Visit https://catrinawelch.com for more information.

Get catrina’s books on Amazon








How Grief Taught me Joy

Greif, Kids, Life, , , ,

Today would have been my baby girl’s twentieth birthday. With each year since her passing, we think of all the milestones she would have accomplished had we been granted the privilege of raising her into adulthood like our other children.  It’s hard to imagine Rebecca  as anything except a beautiful, delicate newborn. 

Her fifth birthday was the hardest. The thought of her being old enough to go to kindergarten felt like grief all over again. Suddenly, remembering her as a baby felt like a violation to reality. This birthday is another painful one.  Continue reading How Grief Taught me Joy →