Tag Archives: confidence conflicts

Raising Confident Kids

With the first hospital visit, adults begin “speaking life” over your baby: 

She’s beautiful!

He’s so big!

As children grow, we naturally announce and affirm each progression of their development:

Look how he holds his head up.

She took her first step!

A healthy self-esteem is encouraged. 

Every child comes into this world with the need to understand their purpose and value and the answers naturally come from their environment and the things we teach them.

If you have a healthy self-image, then chances are your children will have less of a hang up on their appearance.

But not necessarily. 

What if you have a completely different style and personality than your daughter? Maybe you love fashion and formal events are a big part of your life. You feel great when you are dressed up and socializing, but your daughter resists anything social and hates when you make a fuss about what she wears. Should you “encourage her” to be more like you? Do you release her “do her own thing”?

We don’t always know what to do. We may take one approach to handling these conflicts and then change our mind and do the opposite. Wether we try to “encourage” or “release” we feel guilty and we cause confusion because we are unsure. 

Certainty creates confidence

After twenty years of teaching people about the six various clothing personalities, I am still amazed at how much it helps a woman’s confidence when she learns her personal Image Identity (Img.ID). It’s very much like the liberation one feels when they learn they are task-oriented vs. people oriented or introverted vs extraverted. Understanding yourself sets you free from trying to be something you are not. 

It’s really not that simple, though. 

One of the biggest hurdles I face when helping a client let go of her insecurities about her image, is the expectations put on her as a child–by her environment and her own reasoning. 

Children form so many of their understandings from the things they see and hear. 

“Mom is happy when she looks beautiful. I’m uncomfortable dressing up, I can’t be beautiful.” 

Their reasoning is not always logical; they are children. 

If we don’t talk to tour kids about self-image, their logic may never change. (Until, of course, they encounter a Supreme MakeOver, but that’s a blog for another day. Right now I am on a mission to help parents understand their children’s Img.ID so that they can teach them to BE who they were designed to be.)Talking to a child about body image and self-confidence is sometimes awkward, but the earlier we do it the easier it is and the more effective our teaching.

“Imagine how confident the next generation will be when they learn to accept and appreciate their distinct, authentic style while they are still young.”

  This is why I wrote Know Who You Are–for Kids! 

Know Who You Are–for Kids! cover
Child’s book (and teaching tool) available for pre-order soon!

Over the next six weeks I will be introducing to you the 12 characters in this new children’s book. Journey with me–and Katy (the Natural)–as we consider the different strengths of each of her friends, who each represent a different style. My hope is that each child who hears about Katy’s struggle with body image and self-esteem will learn from her revelation and also find the confidence to be all that God designed them to be. 

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If this topic interests you, would you help me spread the word about my new book? Share this blog, connect and converse with me  on FacebookTwitter PinterestLinked In, Goodreads  and join my Facebook Book Launch Group by clicking “visit group: on my author page at:   https://www.facebook.com/catrinawelchauthor/ where I will be sharing inside info and great giveaways!

Gamine – the Bold Beauty

Some women are strong, spunky and secure in their opinions. The Gamine clothing personality is average to short in stature,  but she is not fragile: not in build, and not in personality. 

She is like a Cala Lily: strong, sturdy and full of color and variety. The trumpet-shaped flower can endure almost any condition, in the same way, Gamines thrive in situations where most of us would not know what to do. When they see crisis, they jump to action—like the flower that pokes through the ground before the rest of the plant. 

Grace makes or breaks the Gamine’s beauty

The Bold Beauty has an intense work ethic, which sometimes overrides her intense love for fun. She has a quick wit, level head and a passion to fix things. Unfortunately, sometimes her drive for justice can be intimidating to others–and to herself.  Continue reading Gamine – the Bold Beauty

Natural – the Casual Beauty

Some women are simply laid back and casual; calm, cool and collected in nature. Those with the Natural clothing personality are athletic and nature-oriented and tend to be comfortable with themselves.

She is like a wild flower, strong, sturdy and able to endure most environments; she has little need of care and attention. The Natural’s bright cheer brings life to any occasion, making a formal affair less stuffy and a casual event more inviting. She should be careful, however, to stay true to her casual nature, no matter the formality of her environment or she may come across as phony.

Simplicity makes or breaks the Natural’s beauty

The Natural has little interest in fashion or Continue reading Natural – the Casual Beauty

Dramatic Video

Often misunderstood to be overly confident, the Dramatic is actually a very sensitive woman.

The Dramatic clothing personality (which I call the Exotic Beauty) is like a tropical flower. Her unusual beauty has a powerful presence that stands out and makes a statement. Unless she has a secondary style, this girl is tall and has strong, straight features. She is passionate and expressive and has a strong drive for excellence.

All too often, girls with this Image Identity (Img.ID) are completely unaware of the influence they have on others.

Intimidation may look like rejection

Continue reading Dramatic Video

Dramatic – the Exotic Beauty

Some women are fast-paced, hardworking and unafraid to take risks. Those who are Dramatic in style have a daring nature that is seemingly uninhibited by the influences around her. Her long, straight features and extreme height are indication of her character. The Dramatic woman (or man, or child…) is focused and passionate about all she does.

She is like an exotic flower, her unusual beauty has a powerful presence that stands out and makes a statement. All too often, however, this girl is completely unaware of the influence she has on others. In reality, this Image Identity (Img.ID) really has a very sensitive spirit and when others feel intimidated by her, she often reads it as rejection. 

Relatability makes or breaks the Dramatic’s beauty

Continue reading Dramatic – the Exotic Beauty

Classic – the Refined Beauty

Some women are dignified, sophisticated and professional in all their ways. Those who are Classic in style are graceful and conservative and a pleasure to look. A balanced figure and proportionate features give evidence to her character. The Classic woman (or man or child…) tends to be very proper  and detailed in all areas of life.

Like a rose, the Refined Beauty has a guard about her, making it rather difficult to get to know her at first. In her younger years, she is tight and withdrawn and a bit protective of her heart. When upset, her words may be sharp, but in general, she doesn’t speak up unless spoken to. 

Peace makes or breaks the Classic’s beauty

Continue reading Classic – the Refined Beauty

Romantic, the Glamorous Beauty

Some women are sensual in appearance and in nature, meaning they give great attention to the elements of taste, smell, touch and visual appeal. These are the kind of women you want to be around when you need comfort because they care deeply and they have a gift of hospitality.

Like the orchid, this woman’s beauty is glamorous and captivating, but sometimes hard to bring to bloom. Orchids will not share their astonishing flowers with the world if they are not cared for properly. They need sun and water like any other flower, but caring for them is very intricate. 

This tropical flower generally needs warmth but must have a change in climate or they will not bloom. They need to be in the sun but cannot take direct sunlight. They need to be watered slowly and precisely because too much or too little water will keep their flowers from showing. 

Vulnerability makes or breaks the Romantic’s beauty

Continue reading Romantic, the Glamorous Beauty

Ingénue video

Often mistaken as naive, young or innocent, the Ingénue is actually a very strong woman. She may have a girlish figure and a high voice, but don’t let that be confused for youth or ignorance! Like the Baby’s Breath that first appears to be a small flower but is actually a very strong bush, the Ingénue is an amazingly tenacious woman. The flower is used to covers the stems in a bouquet of flowers. This girl also completes others with her beautiful creativity and encouraging heart.
Ingénues need to be true to their authentic personality or they may lose their confidence. This is also true with their image. When the Delicate Beauty dresses in heavy fabrics or dark colors (unless she is a combination), her look is overpowered and she may come across as a little girl trying to look grown up. Continue reading Ingénue video

Ingénue, the Delicate Beauty

Some women have a sweet, innocent nature that brings with it a quality of freshness that does not threaten others, but uplifts them and inspires them. These women have a gentle strength that is like a breath of fresh air in our otherwise stressed and striving world.

The Ingénue, like the Baby’s Breath, is the kind of woman (or man… or child!)  that completes those around her. The flower is often used to cover the stems and spaces in a bouquet. The Ingénue’s creative and complimentary nature makes her friends all look and feel more beautiful and strong when she is with them.

little girl, IngénueThis Image Identity, or Img.ID may appear to be dainty and delicate but in reality is strong and sturdy, like the flower that is able to survive environments most flowers cannot endure. In fact, as long as this flower has a mostly-sunny environment and well-drained soil that is not acidic, the Baby’s Breath can thrive and grow into great foliage that covers any area it is given. This young lady is like that: She will do whatever you need her to, she will do it with joy and she will become very influential in any space she is given the authority to. Continue reading Ingénue, the Delicate Beauty

Finding Strength to Embrace your Challenge

During the painful seasons of life, we are more sensitive than usual. Like a physical wound that stings with the slightest touch, emotional wounds may make us susceptible to road rage or irrational tears.

Difficult times also make us more sensitive to the spiritual realm.

Loosing my daughter was certainly one of the most difficult seasons of my life, but through that time I was abundantly blessed. 

One of my sweetest memories of Rebecca’s quick life is the moment when God laid this poem on my heart. It later became my first “publication” which was given out to the many people who came to her funeral. There were so many stories that came back to us about how the poem encouraged others that it made me want to continue writing. 

There is purpose in our pain. 

Rebecca’s death taught me that, as uncomfortable as it is to be vulnerable, it can be very rewarding. If you are suffering in anyway today, I encourage you to ask God to give you the strength to embrace your challenge and wisdom to learn from it. Great things are birthed in great pain. 

With that in mind, and in honor of the twentieth anniversary of my daughter’s “glory day,” I share with you God’s Comfort to Our Family and Friends (click here if picture is too small to read.)

“Don’t waist your tears, let them cleanse you. Don’t waist your pain, let it drive you to make a difference in the life of someone else.”

http://catrinawelch.com/blog/gods-comfort-to-our-family-and-friends/

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As an author and speaker, my passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, I love to use my profession, along with my experiences and training as a Biblical life-coach to help others struggling. If you want to make difference, too, would you become  part of this movement and connect with me on Facebook, Twitter,  Pinterest, Linked In, Goodreads  or consider having me speak at your next event. Visit http://catrinawelch.com for more information.

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3 Reasons Confidence will Help you Succeed

Recently, I was asked to give a thirty-second synopsis of what I have learned about:

The Key to being successful as a creative.

I wanted to laugh and reply with the very same question to the one who was asking me! Thankfully, I had a moment to recognized that my initial response before I had to reply.  By comparing my interviewer’s perspective of my success with my not-so-beautiful-reality (and my perspective of his social media posts to what may not be as amazing as his reality) I was falling into the trap of comparison, the very thing we each must each overcome in order to become “successful” at anything. 

Success is different to each of us, but wether our goal is to sell our craft, perform on stage, build a business or launch our children out into the great big world, we need one thing to succeed: Continue reading 3 Reasons Confidence will Help you Succeed

Romantic Beauty

In honor of Valentine’s Day, I post a quick overview of the Romantic Clothing Personality, which I call the Glamorous Beauty.

To take my FREE quiz and learn your  Image Identity, click here.

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I call my image consultations “Supreme MakeOver” (or SMO) because it changes so much more than a person’s appearance; it teaches them who they are and sets them free from all that comparison. If you would like to have or host a SMO, or if you want to help me launch my next book, Know Who You Are-for Kids!, then please contact me. I can be found on FacebookTwitter PinterestLinked In, Goodreads  and my website is http://catrinawelch.com

 

Get catrina’s books on Amazon