Tag Archives: image

Does your Beauty Fit into a Box?

One of the biggest push-backs I get as an image consultant comes from the fear of bing analyzed. It seems that many people assume that being told which style they are is like being put into a box. In truth, however, knowing which “box” you fit into breaks the walls that can hold you back from being true to yourself–like the Ugly Duckling that I blogged about last week.

Many of us are brought up in a culture that confines us to the definition of beauty that our influencers hold us to. It may be that your mom likes things done “properly” but you don’t notice details and feel as if you just didn’t meet the standard set before you.

Maybe you do care about details and love to make things beautiful, but your family does not. Perhaps they belittled you for your concerns and to this day you hold back from being a woman of excellence because you feel as if it is selfish or prideful?

Altering your appearance is exhausting.

Continue reading Does your Beauty Fit into a Box?

Take this LifeSTYLE Quiz

You are invited to a formal event. How does your heart respond? Some women (and men) enjoy dressing up and socializing. Others feel quite the opposite.

The way you respond to certain lifestyle choices has a lot to say about which style of beauty (or attractive) you are. While your physical attributes are the major indicator of which of the six styles (your personal image identity or Img.ID) you are, your personal preferences are the confirmation. If your physical style does not fall in line with your personal preferences, then you likely have a secondary style or you are in the midst of a Beauty Battle. 

A number of factors come into play when it comes to our personal preferences. The culture, economy and standards of our formative years are certainly strong influences on how we feel about certain lifestyle choices, especially if we have a compliant nature. It is natural to choose that which we are comfortable with, but sometimes we follow the examples set before us without even considering other options because it is all we know.  Continue reading Take this LifeSTYLE Quiz

Are You Stylish?

Stylish, by definition, is trendy, modern, fashionable, sophisticated, elegant, glamorous.

When someone or something is “stylish” it captivates our hearts and attracts our attention. A woman is considered stylish if she follows fashion and gives attention to the details of her makeup, hair and nails. A home is considered stylish if the details and finish are exquisite and up to date.

I submit to you that there are many types of styles and not all of them are high-fashion. Continue reading Are You Stylish?

Making Peace with your Style

When did the quest to find yourself begin? Did you know who you were as a little girl? Did you discover your true identity in High school? Did your passion, purpose and personality suddenly reveal itself, or was it a progressive unveiling?

Who am I?

Most of us question our identity throughout our lives. We begin by roleplaying with our Barbie dolls and continue testing and attempting various attitudes and approaches throughout adolescence. As we try various sports, arts, hobbies and studies. Slowly we discover our likes and dislikes.

As we mature, we learn to relate to others  and begin to solidify our opinions and interests, but many of us continue to “play house” well into the season of managing one for real, because we still have not found peace with our true self. Continue reading Making Peace with your Style

Making Peace with your Image

Glance at a flower and it will amaze you with its beauty. Take a deep look at the details of each pedal, the leaves and it’s stem and you may not be as impressed. I mean really, what is this?

Flowers wilt; they fall over or break, and very often they have many deformities. No flower is perfect, yet only a fool would dare to criticize the details of that which was presented to them for sheer pleasure. I’m not saying that no one rejects the bouquet of flowers given them (Actually, I’ve personally witnessed an ungrateful critique insult the generosity of their flower-giver’s heart.). I am saying that those who are critical of beauty are foolish. Continue reading Making Peace with your Image

Never Neglect Doing This

If you are like most women, you may very well skip this one important step in your self-care regiment. After all, it does seem a bit frivolous and there’s already a lot to do to get ready for the day. You take the time to clean your face, and surely you use a moisturizer before putting on your makeup, getting dressed and eating, but throwing in this one extra step of using a toner is just too much. Really, applying toner only takes one minute at the most, but hey, every second counts, right? Why do they put in that silly step anyway?

All quality skin care systems include a toner.

Cleansers are designed to pull any built-up oils, makeup or dirt from your face. In order to work, they naturally disrupt the acidity of your skin. The toner is designed to bring the ph balance of your skin back to it’s normal state. Also, toners are humectants, so they also help to bind the moisturizer to your skin.

After studying cosmetology (granted, it was thirty-two years ago) I should know the importance of toning my face, but I’ve been guilty of skipping this step, too. Life is busy, and it’s easy to ignore small details, especially when it comes to taking care of ourselves. Most habits take time to form or reform, and self care is no different.

Routines gradually evolve for better, or for worse.

As our schedules and needs change, our habits change, too. I started skipping my toner soon after I started using an essential oil (EO) skin care system. EOs are, by nature, ph balanced and because they are complete molecules, the skin absorbs their moisturizing benefits easily. In my mind, the need for toner somehow became less urgent and I got a bit lazy in my skin care regime.

Recently, I realized was out of cleanser and moisturizer, yet I had extra un-opened toner in my cabinet. I brought the toner back into my regime simply because I didn’t want to waste this precious product. About two weeks later, after just hitting a new decade and feeling old, I was amazed at how much my skin had “toned up”. I may be feeling older, but my skin was looking smoother and tighter! There are two other amazing benefits of toner, which I needed to be reminded of:

  1. Toner deep-cleans the skin. We tend to think of toner as an anti-bacterial, drying agent designed to aid oily skin in fighting acne. As we age, we may think this is no longer important to us, but in reality clogged pores are still dirty, whether they cause blemishes or not.
  2. Toner tightens the skin. As you apply toner to your face, it cleanses the pores of any residue your cleanser left behind. It also closes the pores and tightens the cell gaps, reducing the ability of impurities and environmental contaminants to penetrate the skin. This process also reduces fine lines and wrinkles.

How silly I was to skip such powerful product!

There’s  a life-lesson in this…

(I can hear my kids groaning now.) But, come on, you knew it was coming, right? Image-coaching is just not enough for me; I’ve got to do the life-coaching, too. Here it is:

  1. When life gets busy, let’s be careful not to skip important details. I think of how easy it is for us to do quick “clean ups” in our relationships. When we mess up, we may easily say we are sorry, but do we take the time to be sure there’s no seed of bitterness developing in the one we offended? It’s the deep, heart to heart apologies that make our relationships strong and tight, let’s not be afraid to take that step.
  2. When we do good and behave well, let’s be careful not to rely on self-righteousness. No matter how “clean” we think we are, no one is completely pure and holy. Every one of us needs a deep cleansing (daily!) and only Jesus is pure enough to be our spiritual toner. It’s through repentance that we are clothed with His righteousness, let’s not be afraid to seek His forgiveness.
If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. -1 John 1:8, 9

*****

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As an author and speaker, my passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those I’ve struggled with, such as betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, I love to use my profession, along with my experiences and training as a Biblical life-coach to help others find confidence. This is why they call me the “Image Consultant without the shopping obsession.”

If you want to make difference, too, please onnect with me on FacebookTwitter PinterestLinked In, Goodreads  or consider having me speak at your next event. Visit http://catrinawelch.com for more information.

How Rhythm Affects Confidence

Consider the weather patterns and the cycles of seasons. The ocean’s tides ebb and flow aw the moon waxes and wanes. We literally schedule our lives around by the rhythm of nature. If there were ever a pause in the rising or setting of the sun, we would all panic.

It’s not just your surroundings that has rhythms. So does your body. Your breath and heartbeat have patterns; so do your physical needs, such as eating, sleeping and… getting your hair done.
When I worked in the salon, I was always fascinated by the different responses my clients had regarding scheduling their next appointment. I could always count on the Classic and the Gamine to fill my book six weeks out. The others, not so much. The Ingénue and Romantics were concerned someone else might need them and they did not want to say, “no” to anyone (or cancel on me!), so they would  shy away from rescheduling. The Natural doesn’t like to spend money and, to her, haircuts are a frivolous expenses. Besides, they do well with “wash-n-wear” styles that don’t need as much upkeep. The Dramatic, on the other hand, wants another appointment–she loves beauty treatments, but her spontaneous nature doesn’t like being committed to something that might keep her from another opportunity.

Yes, I may be generalizing. Your Img.ID is not the sole factor in how often you get your hair done–life is far more complicated than that–but, still, let’s consider why it’s so hard for most women to schedule time for themselves.


The way you feel about self-care is a big indicator of your Img.ID:

C: It’s necessary, professional and a private matter (Classic)

N: Haircuts are only worth the time or money when it’s necessary and practical (Natural)

D: Style and hygiene are important. Hair is a creative tool of expression. (Dramatic)

I: I love to be creative with my hair myself. There’s no need for someone else to fuss over me. (Ingénue)

R: I’d love to get pampered and made beautiful, but it feels selfish. (Romantic)

G: Maintaining a clean-cut appearance is vital to my identity. I like to have fun with my hair. (Gamine

Click the letter to learn more about that Image Identity, including What2Wear.

Find your rhythm

As professionals, most hairdressers will suggest another appointment before you check out of the salon. (It helps us to keep working, but more than that, it ensures that the client will be able to secure her favored stylist.) I cannot tell you how many times I’ve had a clients shocked that she needed me exactly when I wanted to schedule her.

If you have long, one length hair, you may be able to stretch out the time between your haircuts, but if you wear your hair with any kind of a style, I would recommend you figure out how often you will need a trim and plan accordingly. Most women need their hair cut every six to eight weeks. If you wear very short hair, then you may need two cuts within that time.

Hair grows. You may not be able to set your clock by the  rhythm of your follicle growth, but you can count on it enough to put some maintenance time in your calendar.

If you struggle with taking time for, or spending money on, your hair, I challenge you to consider your thoughts. Do you also feel guilty when you need to sleep or eat? I hope not! A woman with Confident Beauty knows her needs and takes responsibility for meeting them (including when that means asking for help). I think we could all learn from the rhythms of nature.

We all  take the time to sleep every day. We all buy groceries  every week. And we all have some things we need to take care of every month or so–like a haircut.

Think about it.

When we find the rhythm for taking care of our hair like we do our other cycles, we don’t have to go through the emotional torment of trying to decide if we need or deserve a little salon time  or not. Instead, when our hair starts to frizz or flop, we can rest assured in the confidence that we already have an appointment

No guilt. No shame. No need to justify, excuse or explain. Just pure and simple self-care.

*****

As an author and speaker, Catrina’s passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, Catrina now uses her profession, her own powerful stories and her training as a Biblical life-coach to reach the heart in a way that is relatable, encouraging and inspiring. Her message is balanced with both fashion and faith and is making a difference  in the lives of women and girls all over!  To be part of this movement, connect with her on FacebookTwitter PinterestLinked In, Goodreads  and consider having her speak at your next event. Visit http://catrinawelch.com for more information.

Why Wearing Black Could be Killing your Confidence

I can almost hear you protesting my blog already…

If you’re like most women, you love to wear black and it is the dominate color of your entire wardrobe and my suggestion that black could be killing your confidence already has you irate, doesn’t it?

“If you take my black away, I will have nothing to wear!”

This is, by far, the biggest push back I get as an image-coach.

There are many reasons people love to dress in dark, dull clothing:

Black is seen as professional

Continue reading Why Wearing Black Could be Killing your Confidence

Are you Thankful for Your Beauty?

A woman’s home is a big indication of her heart.

My husband’s company just finished a small development of quaint, custom homes in the same village where he has been building elaborate masterpieces for many years. This was our first time doing a whole neighborhood and I found the social dynamics very interesting. Because a woman’s home is a significant part of her identity, I feel it an appropriate topic for a blog on Confident Beauty.

You were custom built.

Some developments are cookie-cutter; each house is the same style. In our development there are six different styles. Because there are only eleven homes and the styles which are duplicated are either mirrored, turned or altered in some way, none of them look alike. Whether the house was purchased before, during or after completion, each home has details that are crafted specifically for the homeowner, increasing the variety even more.

There are only six different styles of feminine beauty and yet no two women are alike. You may be a short, full-figured, curly-hair blonde with a round face, blue eyes and a button nose, but that doesn’t mean you look anything like another woman of the same description. This is because Continue reading Are you Thankful for Your Beauty?

Transitioning Your Wardrobe for the New Season

For those of us in New England, it’s time to transition the wardrobe. Although we are still having some fair weather, the light summer clothing is just not going to do it much longer.

As Autumn sets in and you pull out last year’s warmer wardrobe, do you find yourself excited to wear those items again? If not, it may be time to do the dreaded weeding. Theoretically, the things you put away last year should only be things that you love, are in good condition and still fit… or at least still fit last spring. Yet in reality, most of us throw last season’s clothing into our storage area without considering if we will ever wear it again or not. Now, as the weather demands we pull them out again and restock our closet, we look at our options and feel this looming dread and frustration over What2Wear.

There is plenty of choices hanging before us, yet we cry out, “I have nothing to wear!”

 

What would you do?

It’s a cool autumn day and you need a light jacket, so you go through what you have only to find that last year’s favorite is now a bit snug, has a stain and is missing a button. There's a number of ways you could deal with this Image Issue:

C: Bring it to the drycleaner and seamstress and wear it for a few more years.

N: Keep your chin up and wear it anyway.

D: Leave it in your closet and go buy a cute new jacket and tell your husband you’ve had it forever.

I: Leave it in your closet and go without a jacket.

R: Leave it in your closet and wear a favorite sweatshirt instead.

G: Same as D, but tell your husband (and anyone else who questions or comments) that you got an amazing deal.


Note: These choices represent the typical responses of each Image Identity. Click the letter to learn more about that style, including What2Wear.

dresses-53319_640Science has proven over and over again that we are more confident about making any decision if there are fewer choices. Yet for some reason our nature reasons that we should “keep our options wide open” and not throw out anything we already possess.

 

The guilt over waste

Since early childhood we have been trained not to waste. After all, there are starving, naked children all over this world. Everyone knows that good people should be resourceful and respectful with what they have. We live in a greedy, materialistic society, but if we want to be honorable citizens, we should be content with that which we have. Right?

But isn’t sharing our hand-me-downs with Salvation Army more resourceful and respectful than hording our unwanted items in our cluttered closet? And isn’t clinging to things we don’t even want more of an indicator of materialism than it is of contentment? Honestly, I think the real issue is more about fear than it is values. I know I’m guilty of being afraid that, if I give away that stupid jacket, I will wish I still had it. Have you ever been afraid you won’t find something else to replace your worn out favorite? Or that you will forget the memory it represents… or that the person who gave it to you will find out you don’t really like it. Yet there’s a good chance they don’t even remember, because they haven’t seen you wear it in years anyway.

Take a picture of it.

Just saying.

When we get right down to the matter, I think we hold onto things because we are afraid we are being wasteful or ungrateful or that mom will find out we are no longer frugal.  We are afraid of what other people think.

Maybe it’s time we get over our fears and begin to weed out anything in our wardrobe that holds us back from being a Confident Beauty.

*****

As an “Image consultant without the shopping obsession,” I help women and girls overcome confidence conflicts by unveiling the power and purpose of their personal Image Identity (Img.ID) and teach them to accentuate their authentic beauty so they can forget about their appearance and think about others. Please consider me as a speaker for your next event. You can find me on Facebook, TwitterLinked In, Goodreads. For ideas of What2Wear, find me on Pinterest where I have a board for each personal Img.ID.