Tag Archives: image issues

5 Practices for Overcoming Self-Consciousness

It seems obvious that the tendency to compare your life with others’ is second nature and cannot be stopped.

IMG_2099No wonder the social media has created such an epidemic of self-consciousness. With each visit to Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest… we find ourselves faced with the temptation to compare our lives to the pictures we see. We know, of course,  that what we are only shown the “postable” parts of our friends’ lives, but we still compare what we see to the parts of our lives that we would never post.

And they compare their “un-postables” with our “postables”. Continue reading 5 Practices for Overcoming Self-Consciousness

4 Steps to Dressing True to You

When you walk into a room which shows up first, you or your clothing?
One way to find out is to listen to the compliments you get. Are about you or your outfit?There’s a big difference between, “You look beautiful!” and “What a beautiful dress!” As women, we enjoy a compliment, and we should. It’s like a hug that simply affirms us and encourages our spirit.

The bearhug of all compliments–the I want for every one of my clients–is: “Oh, wow, that is so YOU!” The wow factor is by far the biggest confidence booster, don’t you think? How often do you get a “wow”?

I’m sorry. I know,  that was a painful question.

I don’t get them very often either, and, hey, I know how to dress true to myself.

shy-863056_640In reality,  it takes a confident, generous person to give away such a valuable thing as words of affirmation–especially when Continue reading 4 Steps to Dressing True to You

When Looking Good is the Last Concern

fullsizeoutput_1541If you ever want to find out if you have Image Issues, go skiing in extremely cold conditions and see if you care how you look.

Last weekend’s fierce winds brought the wind-chill factor down to a negative twenty-five degrees, but that didn’t take into account the wet snow on my exposed cheeks. It was literally painful; an adventure I would never have even considered years ago when I was young enough to handle it (and dumb enough to only have cute ski gear!).

I wasn’t brave when I was young. I didn’t take risks. Somehow I got the impression that the comfort-zone was where i’d find peace. I didn’t find it there.

There is no peace in taking the easy way out of a challenge; there is only disappointment and the stress of trying to change the circumstances. When I was on that mountain too cold to cope, all i could focus on was the weather and, at my skill-level, it is not safe to think of anything other than navigating the slopes. i couldn’t just quit because the only way back to warmth was to take another lift and ski there.

Keep going.

We cannot always get out of fierce and frightening situations. Sometimes we must find a way to conquer our mountain. I heard from a lot of you regarding my blog last week and I know many of you are facing very difficult mountains right now. You feel like you are on a slippery slope in a nasty storm with no proper equipment and no knowledge of how to ski. Some of you have also lost a Trisomy 18 baby or are dealing with a loved one’s depression or addiction.

You are not alone.

We may be far from our comfort-zone, but we can still have peace. When we can’t move the mountain or change the weather, we can still bundle up and enjoy the ride. When I was losing hope skiing, I decided to stop pushing through the pain and let my husband know I couldn’t take it anymore. I was so grateful when he patiently adjusted my equipment and strongly assured me that I could finish the run.

The funny thing is, once he fixed my face mask and I was properly protected, I was able to enjoy the experience again.

And we skied all day.

Yes, it was still bitter cold, but I was no longer rawly exposed to it’s danger. I had the upper hand. I was prepared, which disarmed my fears.

When I got cold again, we stopped again.

Most of all, we enjoyed the adventure of conquering a challenge.

If you are freezing and fearful as you face your mountain today, I encourage you to stop a moment and share your heart with someone who can help you adjust your gear. Maybe you could help them with their’s, too, because more then likely they need to figure out the mountain, too. Life is not a comfort-zone; it’s an adventure and it’s the difficulties that make the greatest adventures. Be brave, take care of yourself  and enjoy the thrill of conquering your mountain. You can do this!

After all, skiing is simply falling gracefully.

*****

As an author and speaker, Catrina’s passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, Catrina now uses her profession, her own powerful stories and her training as a Biblical life-coach to reach the heart in a way that is relatable, encouraging and inspiring. Her message is balanced with both fashion and faith and is making a difference  in the lives of women and girls all over!  To be part of this movement, connect with her on FacebookTwitter PinterestLinked In, Goodreads  and consider having her speak at your next event. Visit http://catrinawelch.com for more information.

When Beauty Triggers Ugly

By definition, an Ingénue (pronounced: änjəˌno͞o) is an innocent or unsophisticated young woman, especially one in a play or film. The Ingénue Image Identity is the Delicate Beauty. She typically has tight skin, a petite figure, softly feminine facial features and a sweet, gentle voice. Ingénues are almost always assumed younger Continue reading When Beauty Triggers Ugly

Your Strength is the Battlefield for your Confidence

By definition, anything dramatic is theatrical, obvious, exciting, exaggerated, striking.

The Dramatic Image Identity has a penchant and passion for the arts, fashion and beauty. Because of this woman’s strength is her eye for detail and gift in creativity, she also does  well in areas of architecture and design.

Dramatics are tall women with long, straight features and bold coloring (unless they are a combination Img.ID) who have a strong presence about them. They are exciting, inviting and highly influential.

Yet they seldom know it. Continue reading Your Strength is the Battlefield for your Confidence

Deadheading your Closet

By definition, anything natural is normal or ordinary and not made by humans. This defines the Casual Beauty very well, as this girl is most attractive when she keeps her image simple. Many of these girls consider themselves ordinary and boring, but others enjoy their unpretentious, uncomplicated understated authenticity.

Naturals appreciate beauty, but seldom get hung up on attaining it. In fact, most Image Issues roll off her back. Of course she would love to look beautiful, but she doesn’t love to dress up or wear makeup. Whenever she breaks her motto (Which is “less is more”), she feels–and looks–awkward and phony, so she often gives up on trying. She is strong enough in personality to let the social pressures of fashion roll off her back, but she is human and she, too longs to ” fit in” Yet  she’s not fancy and she never will be.

But she is beautiful.

Naturally.

When this girl learns how to accentuate her beauty without overstating it, she is one of the most attractive women at the gala because she is real and relatable. Authenticity is inspiring and that is what is beautiful and captivating.  Continue reading Deadheading your Closet

How Confidence and Beauty Intertwine

  • When a woman believes she looks beautiful, she feels confident.
  • When a woman is confident, she radiates beauty.

It really doesn’t matter which style she is nor how tall, slim or old she is. The color of her eyes, hair or skin do not change the fact, nor does her nationality, upbringing or experiences in life.

A woman’s beauty is far more about what she believes than what she wears.

  • A young, buff, high-fashioned, fully-serviced diva who is mean and rude is not beautiful at all.
  • An old, wrinkled, out of shape, compassionate woman of wisdom is absolutely lovely.
  • A supermodel who hates herself is not beautiful.
  • An abused and neglected woman with strength and hope is stunning and inspiring.

I’ve spent 30 years teaching women and girls how to accentuate their beauty–that’s easy. Guiding her through Image Issues is not–mostly because it is so rare that she wants to deal with the mirror and the soul at the same time.

  • A girl who feels ugly, unwanted, invisible and inadequate may strive to perfect her image, or she may loose all confidence of ever being beautiful.
  • A girl who feels her image is her worth may strive to keep her confidence with beauty which is never satisfied and constantly changing. Or she may hate the attention she attracts and the pain beauty causes.

These women either love me (as an image coach) or avoid me because beauty can be a painful and embarrassing topic.

Confident Beauty is not found in the mirror until it is settled in the soul.

It takes a brave and mature woman to Continue reading How Confidence and Beauty Intertwine

3 Rules for Dressing Up

“Tis the season for family gatherings and celebrations. With all the parties to attend, Image Issues easily arise. In order to feel confident at the festivities you attend, here are three general rules for What2Wear:

  • Know the formality

girl-775342_640Perhaps you have faced this Confidence Conflict: You thought the party was formal, so you show up all decked out, only to find your friends in jeans and tees. You feel like a fool, as if you were trying to demand attention; a show off. A Drama Queen. (Yea, this happens to the Dramatic, the Exotic Beauty, quite often.)

Or perhaps it was the other way around, and you under-dressed for a more formal event. This is just as awkward (this is more apt to happen to the Natural, the Casual Beauty or the Gamine, the Bold Beauty).

To avoid the uncomfortable feeling of not fitting in, know the formality

Continue reading 3 Rules for Dressing Up

Are you Thankful for Your Beauty?

A woman’s home is a big indication of her heart.

My husband’s company just finished a small development of quaint, custom homes in the same village where he has been building elaborate masterpieces for many years. This was our first time doing a whole neighborhood and I found the social dynamics very interesting. Because a woman’s home is a significant part of her identity, I feel it an appropriate topic for a blog on Confident Beauty.

You were custom built.

Some developments are cookie-cutter; each house is the same style. In our development there are six different styles. Because there are only eleven homes and the styles which are duplicated are either mirrored, turned or altered in some way, none of them look alike. Whether the house was purchased before, during or after completion, each home has details that are crafted specifically for the homeowner, increasing the variety even more.

There are only six different styles of feminine beauty and yet no two women are alike. You may be a short, full-figured, curly-hair blonde with a round face, blue eyes and a button nose, but that doesn’t mean you look anything like another woman of the same description. This is because Continue reading Are you Thankful for Your Beauty?

3 Guidelines for Choosing the Right Shoe

Your shoes make or break your outfit.

I cannot tell you how many times I have had a friend or client call in a panic over how to complete the outfit she has chosen for a formal affair. Perhaps you have been there yourself: you found the perfect dress and figured the shoes in your closet would be just fine but now you put it all together and it simply doesn’t work.

Subconsciously, we all know that the style, weight, texture and color of the shoe should always compliment the outfit, but we until we see them together, our mind’s eye may think the new dress will work out well with what already have. Yet far too often we are wrong and if we don’t try them on together until the big day, we may very well have a serious Image Issue on our hands.

This is one of the reasons understanding your style and coloring can save you a lot of trouble. If you always follow the guidelines for your Image Identity, you will almost always find that each item you add to your closet works well with the rest of it. This is not reality, however, even for those of us who are pretty strict about staying true to our authentic style.

You could be as careful about your choices in style as an image consultant is, yet still find that a special occasion needs special attention to detail when it comes to finding the right shoe. This makes sense, of course, because if the outfit is not something you wear every day, why should you expect it to work well with the shoes you wear everyday? Here are three important details you should consider when choosing a shoe for a special outfit:

  1. The formality: a gown deserves a heel. A dressy outfit deserves more than a sneaker. Not much needs to be said here; most people know not to wear their slippers on a date.
  2. The weight and texture of your shoe should always compliment the fabric in the clothes you are wearing. A heavy jean can carry a heavy leather, but wear a light, lacy dress with a heavy boot and you will make a conflictive statement about who you are–unless, of course, you are an eccentric combination of the casual and delicate beauties.
  3. The color: always choose a shoe that is darker than your hemline for formal occasions–unless you want all the attention drawn to your foot, which you very well may want to.

Always remember that image guidelines are just that, a guide. Like the yellow lines that guide your driving, there are times when it is perfectly fine to break the rules, but when you do, be sure you are intentionally making that choice in order to make a statement and that you are comfortable with the attention it brings.

Your shoe preference is a big indicator of your Img.ID:
img_0078
C:  Quality (The Classic holds onto her shoes for many years.)

N: Practical (To the Natural, comfort is far more important than style.)

D: Style (The Dramatic likes to stay current with fashion.)

I: Femininity (The Ingénue loves dainty shoes.)
R: Quantity (The Romantic loves heels but seldom actually wears them.)

G: Fun (The Gamine prefers comfort, but should be sure her shoes make a statement.) 

Click the letter to learn more about that Image Identity, including What2Wear.

 

In general, it is good to know #What2Wear, not so that we stress out about following rules, but so that we don’t become overwhelmed by all the options available to us. For those times when you find a shoe that you just have to wear–no matter what your guidelines say–consider them your “statement piece.” There’s only so many personalities that are comfortable with making a statement, but if that’s you, make sure you do it with confidence, after all, confidence, not guidelines, is what makes a woman beautiful!

For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.   -Ephesians 6:15

*****

As an “Image consultant without the shopping obsession,” I help women and girls overcome confidence conflicts by unveiling the power and purpose of their personal Image Identity (Img.ID) and teach them to accentuate their authentic beauty so they can forget about their appearance and think about others. Please consider me as a speaker for your next event. You can find me on FacebookTwitterLinked InGoodreads. For ideas of What2Wear, find me on Pinterest where I have a board for each personal Img.ID or consider reading Confident Beauty or Know Who You Are.