Tag Archives: wedding

4 Criteria for Keeping your Clothes

“I’ve got nothing to wear!” his wife whined while she starred down the full racks of clothes in her closet. “Where what you have on… or one of the many you just tried on that are laying on that chair.”

Is there a woman in this world who has not faced this dilemma?

We may have a closet full of great clothes, but if they don’t work together or fit well, then we still have “nothing to wear.” I suppose it’s not as big of a problem for men because their bodies (and their fashions!) don’t change as quickly as our’s do. Perhaps that’s why they just don’t get it.

They have a valid point, though, when they question us on why we hold onto things we cannot wear.

I have helped a lot of women de-clutter their closet. It’s what I do.

Once you know your personal image identity, you want to rid your closet of any style that doesn’t compliment your authentic beauty. If you are a Bold Beauty and you wear lace, for example, you will not only feel awkward and frustrated, others will hesitate to trust you because the gentle impression that lace gives competes with your strong personality. This is the very reason you may put on a beautiful outfit that you love on the hanger (and your husband thinks “it’s fine, just wear that”) yet you cannot bring yourself to wear it out the door.

But why do you hang it back up in the closet? This is the question that we attempted to unravel in my last blog. Today I want to share with you the greatest trick I have learned in helping women let go of that which they don’t want to get rid of.

FullSizeRender 22I have never once completely succeeded at weeding another woman’s closet. Every single client I have ever had has had trouble letting go of at least one item that was not a good fit for her. She doesn’t want to throw away the item because it still has worth in her eyes. She doesn’t want to give away the item because it has an emotional attachment.  She doesn’t want to store away the item because she thinks her body will change again and doesn’t want to forget about it when she regains her figure.

I tend to be non-confrontational. I quince when I watch how Stacy London and Clinton Kelly handle this in What Not to Wear. I know what it’s like to be on a tight budget and I don’t offer the credit card to go shopping with when I do a Wardrobe Weeding, so I have had to come up with another method of helping women transform their image by creating a Confident Closet.

As promised (to introduce my new blog day) I am going to share this tip with you. Drum roll please…

WEAR IT

Yup. If you are having trouble getting rid of something in your closet for any reason, simply wear it for a day. This works for a number of reasons:

  1. It has to fit. If you cannot put it on and feel good about how it covers your body and you refuse to put it the Give Away, Throw Away or Store Away piles (which we do during a weeding) then hang it up in an annoying spot until you can–or until you are ready to pick your pile.
  2. It has to be in good repair. If it puckers or pulls; is ripped, stained or missing buttons; if it rides, falls or splits in anyway that will make you feel self-conscious, then leave it out until you can fix it. Do not put it away until you do, and once it is in good condition, wear it. If you feel confident, keep it. If not, pick your pile.
  3. You have to complete the outfit. If you do not have anything to go with it, put it out somewhere annoying and do not put it back until you either find something to go with it, or you decide it’s time to let it go.
  4. You have to feel confident. If this item you love meets all the requirements above, then leave it in your closet, but wear it on the first opportunity you get. Make a commitment to yourself to decide by the end of the day if you are keeping that item or not.

These are the questions you should ask yourself throughout the day:

Am I comfortable? Or am I fidgeting with the fit? 
When I catch a glimpse of myself do I pull my shoulders back or drop them? 
How is my energy level? Do I feel empowered and aware of those around me or do I feel awkward and self-conscious?
Is this “me” or do I feel like my mother?

What you wear is an explanation of who you are. It’s your brand. Even if you do not know your Img.ID, try this trick with each item in your closet. Systematically go through your entire wardrobe. With each outfit you wear, ask yourself the questions above. At the end of the day, divide your laundry into four piles: Throw Away, Give Away, Store Away and Put Away. Before you know it, your closet may be scares, but everything in it will be a good option and your husband will no longer laugh at you for having “nothing to wear.”

*****

Catrina Welch is an inspirational author and speaker whose passion is empowering women and girls to BE and LET BE. Her expertise as a cosmetologist, image consultant and Biblical life-coach, as well as her personal experiences with abandonment and grief make her message relatable to anyone dealing with rejection, betrayal or loss.

CoversSidebar280x150-1Her latest book, CONFIDENT BEAUTY: Reflecting the One Who Made You, with the Images in your Mirror and in your Soul, will soon be available as an audiobook. Autographed copies of all her books are available on her website at www.CatrinaWelch.com

Is your Clothes Closet like your Kitchen?

It’s part of every woman’s innate nature to desire beauty. Creating beauty, on the other hand, is not necessarily every woman’s forte.

Every woman likes eating, too, but not all of us like to cook!

Personally, I could go either way on when it comes to cooking. I like creating a meal for my family to enjoy, as long as I’m not too hungry to think and I have all the ingredients on hand to cook with. I love to go out to eat, too. It’s wonderful to have someone else create a scrumptious meal and place it right in front of me all prepared. At a restaurant they even do the clean up!

Creating an outfit is a lot like cooking. Just as Continue reading Is your Clothes Closet like your Kitchen?

What Makes a Bride Beautiful?

Bride_with_bouquetShe takes her father’s arm and enters the sanctuary as the entire congregation stands to their feet in awe. Her beauty captivates them, but their gaze does not distract her. Her heart is set on reaching the altar to stand beside the man she loves as they commit their lives to one another. It’s a beautiful moment, one that leaves an impression on the minds of each who witness it.

Every bride should hear the sweet sound of her guests’ gasp when the doors open and she enters the room. It’s something most girls dream about. It’s also something many girls fear won’t happen. But it does. And it has little to do with the physical attributes of the bride. In fact, no stylist or fashion designer should ever take the credit for making a bride beautiful.

Her groom should.

The thing that makes a bride glow more than her form-fitted gown, her exquisite updo or flawless makeup is the knowledge that she is loved.

A woman who feels loved feels confident and free.

Confident that dreams come true. Confident that, with him by her side, she can face the world.

Free to be herself because she is accepted, chosen, and wanted.

It’s this poise that makes her stand up tall and float down the aisle in front of a congregation of people watching her. Confidence makes a woman beautiful.

I can almost hear the thoughts of those of you who lost that poise after the honeymoon wore off. I know the lonely feeling of being married but not feeling loved. It made me ugly. Eighteen years ago I was given a second chance, and this time I realize that marriage requires maintenance just as my body does. If I stop exercising I get weak. If I don’t exercise love, my marriage gets weak. True love doesn’t just die; we let it. Love is a choice more than it is an emotion. Sometimes the best motivation to a good workout is to be in the gym with someone strong. If you want a strong marriage, get around another couple who is truly in love. Feelings follow actions.

I’d blog more about that, but I have a wedding to get to.

1 Peter 4:8 NLT

Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.

*****

Catrina Welch is an inspirational author and speaker whose personal experience with overcoming rejection, betrayal and loss–as well as her expertise as a cosmetologist, image consultant and Biblical life-coach–is empowering women to BE and LET BE.

Her latest book, CONFIDENT BEAUTY: Reflecting the One Who Made You, with the Images in your Mirror and in your Soul, is now available in your favorite bookstores. Autographed copies of all her books are available on her website at www.CatrinaWelch.com

Overcoming Bridesmaid Blues with Confidence

This beautiful bridal party each held a flower that complimented their Img.ID
This beautiful bridal party each picked their own dress and held a flower that complimented their Img.ID

What a great time of year for a wedding on Cape Cod! I’m excited to be part of a multinational one this weekend. Working with a German bride has been so much fun! I don’t know if it’s her culture, her strong Christian faith or her beautiful temperament, but preparing a bride for her most photographed day is not always this peaceful and pleasant.

Weddings can be extremely stressful for women of any nationality–and not just for the bride. In some ways its even harder for the bridesmaids who will also be photographed all day. At least the bride pick’s her own gown. Well usually. Women who don’t get a say in their attire face some serious Confidence Conflicts.

Formal events only intensify the image issues in a woman’s heart. At a wedding, the guest will gaze upon the bride’s beauty and she certainly feels that pressure, but her bridesmaids also have to walk down that isle with all eyes on them! This is especially hard when she doesn’t like the dress the bride picked out.

So why do these girls give in to wearing what they don’t like? In my experience, there are three reasons:

  1. The bride has a strong opinion of what she likes (and even compliant girls will speak up since it is her day.)
  2. The bridesmaid doesn’t really know (or know how to appropriately say) what she likes.
  3. It is culturally expected and accepted for the bridesmaids to give up their will for the bride’s.

Personally, I feel bad about putting my Romantic girlfriends in Dramatic gowns, but honestly, I (like most young brides) didn’t know how to BE or LET BE when I got married. If I had, I would have followed the now popular tradition of allowing the girls to choose any dress in the bride’s chosen color. I love this tradition; it shows unity yet gives room for individuality.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t solve the problem completely–unless the bride chooses a color that all her friends love. Which can be done if she chooses a neutral color that compliments all skin tones, but that’s a blog for another day.

If you are getting ready to walk down the aisle in a wedding ceremony, I commend you for supporting your friend on her important day. If you don’t love your dress, remember that your confidence is what’s most beautiful and don’t let self-consciousness rob your joy. Focus on serving the bride well and enjoying the celebration.

John 15:13 (NKJV)

Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.