Tag Archives: working woman

Tuesday’s Tip: UNnagging

The heart of my ministry to women throughout the years has mostly been about teaching women to cast their cares on the One who cares for them, to do what it takes to meet their own needs, and to have a cheerful heart toward their responsibilities to their loved ones.

Women were designed to help others. We are nurturers and comforters and our power to influence those around us is stronger than we seem to understand. But “if mamma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” I love that saying (you see it all over my website) because it is a powerful reminder of how much our attitude can change the atmosphere around us, causing a catch 22 of misery loves (or more accurately: demands!) company.

We have to be careful as wives and moms… and sisters and friends… to choose our battles wisely. Solomon knew what he was talking about when he said “Hope deferred makes the heart sick,” Prov. 13:12 no doubt, with as many wives as he had, he understood how a disappointment can shut a woman down emotionally (yea, I know men do too, but they usually fight it out and are over with it, we tend to hang on to our stuffed-away-bitterness and slam doors instead of our bewildered offenders who simply want to get away from us.)

Often the battle we are trying to fool ourselves into believing we are not fighting is over something as simple as the left behind jacket (shoes… towels… dishes… you name it!) Wouldn’t it be nice if others saw our needs and met them the way we do for them?

They say that “communication is key” but man, it feels like nagging when we have to ask them once again to pick up their things or to put the dish in the dishwasher!

I have come up with two ideas that have helped me stay happy so my family can live in their own home with peace. This Tuesday’s Tip is not about image, although it’s a close priority, it is about keeping up the house.

The buy-back-bin: when my family leaves things out I put them on the steps to be taken up and put away on their way up the stairs. If they do not get the hint, their item ends up in a bin in my coat closet where it stays until requested, or I decide it is time. Items are returned to the child to be put away after they buy them make from me. The price? 10 pushups or 10 situps per item. My kids stay fit, and I stay happy. Actually, they love it too; It has become a “I got you!” game in my house instead of a battle.

We’ve been playing it for years now. The dishes are another story. I just recently figured this one out.

I’ve been training my daughter to take over the  dreaded chore. Now she fights the urge to nag. One day she voiced her frustration to me. I sympathized and told her how I always wanted to make a sign… she asked me to do it.

The obnoxious posting: I could justify framing the subtle UNnagging since I was helping my little girl keep her chore done for more than an hour, so I put it in our shiny clean sink:

The Dishwasher is available for your convenience.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You’ve got to try it!

It works! We tease each other now when we don’t take advantage of our modern day convenience.

Titus 2:4,5  … admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, haste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.

 

 

 

 

To Stay or Not to Stay at Home

 

There is a familiar debate rising in our society after Hilary Rosen’s comments last week about Ann Romney saying, she “has actually never worked a day in her life.” Many stay at home moms are insulted. Once again our nation is fighting out the question: does a stay-at-home-mom work? Is she less of a woman if she doesn’t have a job/career/business as well? Are working moms wrong to leave their children in someone else’s care?

I’ve had seasons of being a stay-at-home-mom and of being a career-mom, I’ve also been blessed to run a business from home with children under feet and I can tell you that they each option has its pros and cons. Personally, I believe we are accountable for our own lives and the choices we make should not be judged by each other. It’s hard enough to juggle our responsibilities as women, why do we torment ourselves with each other’s judgment?

The root of all unhappiness is comparison.

I think it’s time we rise up as Christian women and follow the advice in Titus 2. Instead of spending our energy debating who has a better life, let us join efforts to encourage and advise each other so that we can each do a good job at raising the next generation; whether we need a second income or not. We need each other. Let’s not let pride segregate us. We need to reach out to other moms who are also feeling alone in their efforts to do the right thing. It takes a village to raise a child.

If you are feeling the pressures of the debate today, I encourage you to live your life according to your convictions and do not let the pressures of this world deter you from what you need to do for your family. God is your judge, not them!

Proverbs 16:2  “All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord.”