If there is anything that can frustrate a person and draw out their truest character, it is misjudgment. Tell a friend you think they are being so kind and generous because they want something from you, discipline a child for something their sibling did, challenge a professional with the accusation that they don’t know what they are doing, and you will see the heart of that person right away.
We all have a desire to be accepted.
Misjudgment is often interpreted as deep rejection. Especially by those of us who are sensitive beauties. Let’s take Hannah for example.
You find the story of this Dramatic woman in the Old Testament, when it wasn’t uncommon for a man to have more than one wife–especially if his first wife was infertile. Well, that was Hannah. Her husband loved her, but I can’t imagine she didn’t have to fight a huge Beauty Battle to believe that.
Infertility alone will challenge any woman’s confidence. Add to this girl’s challenge the fact that she was competing with another woman for the attention of her man–and the competition was bearing many children. One after another the babies came. Hannah sat at her dinning room table and ate with all of them, meal after meal. Talk about Confidence Conflicts!
Some challenges you can walk away from, talk yourself out of, or try to ignore. Some you cannot deny. If you read 1 Samuel, chapter one, you will see that Elkanah (the husband) did love Hannah and wanted her to be more confident.
She was accepted.
But the truth remained: she was not his only love. And the stigma remained: she was childless; there was no child that considered Hannah the apple of his eye.
We all want to be the apple of someone’s eye.
It is not enough to be accepted if we are always second rate, this is why popularity is such a trap. It doesn’t satisfy. We can have all the friends in the world, but if there is no one that really knows us and considers us the apple of their eye (the one true love, or very best friend), then it is not enough. Elkanah couldn’t understand what Hannah was feeling (and surely the other wife also felt less-than…) because he was the apple of two sets of eyes!
One set of eyes is enough to satisfy.
We can learn a lot from Hannah. She went to God with her pain. There was no way that her husband could meet the need she had–he couldn’t even relate to it–so she went to the One who knows her best. Yet when she entered the church to pray, she was completely rejected! Nothing like adding insult to injury! As Hannah poured out her heart in prayer, instead of consoling her, the priest treated her like a drunk! But look at how her character began to shine with the challenge of his misjudgment.
““Oh no, sir!” she replied. “I haven’t been drinking wine or anything stronger. But I am very discouraged, and I was pouring out my heart to the LORD. Don’t think I am a wicked woman! For I have been praying out of great anguish and sorrow.” “In that case,” Eli said, “go in peace! May the God of Israel grant the request you have asked of him.” “Oh, thank you, sir!” she exclaimed. Then she went back and began to eat again, and she was no longer sad.” 1 Samuel 15-18
Now that’s a woman of Confident Beauty!
If you are feeling misjudged, rejected or neglected, I encourage you to follow the example of Hannah. Call out to the One who knows you well, make your request known, share your heart with those who misunderstand, accept the blessing of God and press on with joy as you wait for all things to work out for your good.
In “due time” Hannah’s prayer was answered and the blessing was far more than she ever asked or imagined. That’s how God works. You are the apple of His eye, allow Him to meet your needs and you will not be disappointed.
As an author and speaker, Catrina’s passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, Catrina now uses her profession, her own powerful stories and her training as a Biblical life-coach to reach the heart in a way that is relatable, encouraging and inspiring. Her message is balanced with both fashion and faith and is making a difference in the lives of women and girls all over! To be part of this movement, connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Linked In, Goodreads and consider having her speak at your next event.