“Tis the season for family gatherings and celebrations. With all the parties to attend, Image Issues easily arise. In order to feel confident at the festivities you attend, here are three general rules for What2Wear:

  • Know the formality

girl-775342_640Perhaps you have faced this Confidence Conflict: You thought the party was formal, so you show up all decked out, only to find your friends in jeans and tees. You feel like a fool, as if you were trying to demand attention; a show off. A Drama Queen. (Yea, this happens to the Dramatic, the Exotic Beauty, quite often.)

Or perhaps it was the other way around, and you under-dressed for a more formal event. This is just as awkward (this is more apt to happen to the Natural, the Casual Beauty or the Gamine, the Bold Beauty).

To avoid the uncomfortable feeling of not fitting in, know the formality

Before going to the party, read the cues from your invitation and ask the questions. Were you casually asked or was it a formal invitation? What will the hostess be wearing? She is the one to set the mood; good edict dictates that the guests should dress a notch below the formality of the host. It’s her day, let her shine. By following her lead, you are showing her respect and allowing the formality of her event to be as she intended.

A good indication of the event’s formality is the Img.ID of the hostess. If you know her style, you can almost assume the feel of her party:
C: Classy, proper (The Classic)

N: Casual, simple (To the Natural)

D: Distinguished, detailed (The Dramatic)

I: Comfortable, creative (The Ingénue)

R: Glamorous, inclusive  (The Romantic)

G: Fun, festive (The GamineClick the letter to learn more about that Image Identity, including What2Wear.
  • Know the environment

Although our culture encourages us to put fashion over function, it’s important to remember that a party is about the people. The opportunity to dress up and get all fancy is only part of it. In order to really celebrate, you should be prepared to participate. If there will be dancing, wear your dancing shoes, but if it’s an outside party and high heels and skimpy dress are going to leave you feeling frozen and uncomfortable, then  you may want to consider something a little more practical. Looking good should never become the hinderance to your inner beauty. Most of us women shut down emotionally when we are miserable or unable to participate.

Besides, you could be the most beautiful guest at the party but if you are dressed for a beach party instead of a Christmas stroll, then all that others will see is your foolishness. Just sayin.

To avoid dressing foolishly, know the environment.

Before going to the party, find out what the environment will be like, including the location, culture and weather.

  • Know yourself

All that being said, do not compromise who you are. The number one reason people stress out over attending parties is because they don’t want to step out of their comfort zone. The key to overcoming this is first understanding your comfort zone, second, knowing how to BE who you were designed to be, and third, accepting the fact that others have different preferences. After clarifying these three things you will have the ability to be flexible because you will have genuine and true Confident Beauty, which doesn’t wear off like makeup does!

To avoid compromising your authentic beauty, know who you are.

Women with Confident Beauty learn balance. They know how to BE and LET BE. You can blend two very different styles without compromising who you are. The secret to this is to dress for your style and accentuate (or un-accentuate) for the occasion.

  • A formal gal going to a casual party can wear designer jeans and play down her bling.
  • A casual gal going to a fancy party can wear her simple dress and forget the details.
  • A dressy girl can wear her flats for walking and bring her heels for the time she can endure the pain and still be pleasant for the party.
  • Anyone an add their personal style to there winter wear and still be warm.

After all, dressing up is not really about What2Wear. No one is beautiful without confidence, and no party is enjoyable if everyone is self-conscious. The real reason we dress up is to celebrate the greatest gift that was ever given, Jesus. This Christmas, let’s commit to making every party a merry event!


As an author and speaker, Catrina’s passion is in helping women and girls overcome confidence conflicts, especially those involving rejection, betrayal and loss. After 30 years in the beauty industry as both a cosmetologist and an image consultant, Catrina now uses her profession, her own powerful stories and her training as a Biblical life-coach to reach the heart in a way that is relatable, encouraging and inspiring. Her message is balanced with both fashion and faith and is making a difference  in the lives of women and girls all over!  To be part of this movement, connect with her on FacebookTwitter PinterestLinked In, Goodreads  and consider having her speak at your next event. Visit for more information.