Do Children have a Personal Image Identity?



Every child has an innate desire to figure out who they are.

Katie in the mirror
An illustration from Know Who You Are–for Kids! Katie Finds the Confidence to BE her True Self Coming soon.


Am I valued?

Am I wanted?

Am I enough?

It’s only natural for a young mind to find it’s answers from the information around her–a mom’s  words, a dad’s actions, her own comparison to her sister’s beauty–these are each part of the identity struggle that every child must work through.

Each child is unique

Every child is formed within the womb with certain physical traits and personal characteristics. Most parents appreciate their children’s individuality and recognize their potential immediately–and their vision is filtered through the eyes of love. The child, however, needs a bit more time to understand her self-worth.

Physical traits

Facial features and body types certainly change and mature with time, but they are established at birth. A child’s chin, nose and lips may change in size and proportion as she grows, but not in shape. Only a few physical traits change drastically in a growing child, like hair and eye color.

My newest niece, for example, was born a blue-eyed blonde. She just had her first birthday and it has become apparent that the blonde is staying and so is the blue. This is rather unusual. Most babies hair and eye color changes within the first year. 

Personal characteristics

Personalities also tend to change with age. In fact, they take a lifetime to develop, but some personal characteristics show up at birth as well.

When my niece giggled on her arrival day, we all thought it was in our imagination, but the little girl hasn’t stopped giggling yet.


Scientists say that a child’s body chemistry is settled enough at age five to be able to tell her seasonal pallet of colors and those colors will always be the most flattering ones for her. Long after kindergarten, hair and skin color may continue to change, but the undertones will remain. This is why you only need a color analysis once in your life.

Which leads us to one question I am often asked:

At what age can you tell a person’s Img.ID?

Over the years of doing Supreme MakeOvers, I have become more and more passionate about helping mom’s understand their daughter’s style because it helps them get along. I am now on a new mission to help children understand that there are various styles (of both boys and girls) before they get caught up in the Beauty Battle.

It seems to me that there are too many people–young and old–facing serious Image Issues simply for the lack of understanding themselves. Many Confidence Conflicts start with a cruel word on a playground or an unfair comparison with someone completely different than them. Too often these offenses are never really sorted out. Many adults still live with the child-like reasoning of who they are and how they look because they stuffed the pain of that playground experience and believed the twisted-truths were were told.

Maybe you were told you were too big or tall or skinny or short and to this day you cannot see that trait as beautiful because as a child you believed it was unattractive. Children easily mistaken jealous words for truth and they often follow expectations of those they respect, even when those people completely misunderstand of them and lead them in the wrong direction.

Children also believe what they are taught.

Maybe it’s time we teach them that it’s not only the birds, animals, fish, flowers and trees that have a variety of styles. Little boys and girls do too!

To learn your personal Image Identity (Img.ID), take my FREE SELF-ASSESSMENT QUIZ ( click here).


I call my image consultations “Supreme MakeOver” (or SMO) because it changes so much more than a person’s appearance; it teaches them who they are and sets them free from all that comparison. If you would like to have or host a SMO, or if you want to help me launch my next book, Know Who You Are-for Kids!, then please contact me. I can be found on FacebookTwitter PinterestLinked In, Goodreads  and my website is


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *