Rebecca would have been 25 today. Although we have never been able to be with our daughter for any of her birthdays, we still celebrate her quick and powerful life each year. We cook a fish dinner and give our other children gifts as we recall God’s faithfulness to us through all these years.
Every year, I also try to repost this poem, which we shared at her funeral. These words were spoken to my heart one night before she died. Through the years they have encouraged many people. It is my prayer that they will encourage you today as well.
No matter what you are going through, don’t hesitate to climb into the lap of your Heavenly Father, for it is when we need Him most that we feel His presence most powerfully. Of course we have the option of getting angry or bitter, but it’s awful hard to hear Him then. On the other hand, vulnerability and desperation, like we experienced in 1999, produces a peace that surpasses all understanding. May you, too, find the strength which allows you to look back a quarter century later and still feel His amazing love.
God’s Comfort to Our Family and Friends
This child is my gift to you, like a delicate flower.
Do not expect her life to last like that of a carnation.
Her purpose here is a quick and powerful one.
Enjoy each moment.
Do not waste time in meaningless comparison,
And do not get caught in the trap of self-pity,
Or you will miss the blessings I have in store for you.
I love you and long to bear this yoke with you.
I want to ease your pain; I do not want to take it away.
Because if I did, I would take away all the victories, the lessons, the character being created in you.
I promise, I will never leave you, nor forsake you.
I will bear this load with you, if you just draw near to me.
Trust in me, and tell of the wonders you will see.
There are great riches in store for you,
But if you only look at the pain and sorrow, that is all you will see.
Look unto Me and my Son.
When you want to find comfort in the sympathy of others
When you feel as though no one understands,
When you are tempted to sit and compare your circumstances with others,
Look at the cross, look at the life of my Son.
He understands.
He knows what it is like to anticipate great trials and great pain.
He understands rejection and betrayal.
He knows misunderstandings and false accusations.
He understands what it is like to be raised by a father who is not his own.
He has felt every physical and emotional pain.
He has felt separation from Me,
And I have felt the great pain of losing a child I so dearly loved.
Let me bear this cross with you.
You have honored me as Creator and Master; right now, let me be your “Daddy.”
Climb into my lap, and I will give you rest.
Wait upon me and I will renew your strength.
Trust in Me, and I will provide all your needs.
But if you turn from Me, and blame Me, How can I reach you?
I will wait, and I will welcome you back when you are done with your fight,
But I will not fight back. I am a gentleman.
I will stand at the door and knock, but you must open the door.
Only then will I enter in; and you and I shall dine together.
I will be your God, I will provide for you, protect you, comfort you and counsel you.
I love you and My grace is sufficient for you.
My power is made perfect in weakness.
Give to me your challenges, I find that to be the greatest gift of all.
And you will know my peace.
Catrina Welch
It was through the writing of this poem and the feed back it brought me that my love for writing began and lead me to write my first book, Footprints through the Sand, a consolidation of life-altering stories of loving and losing our Trisomy 18 baby. There is great joy in knowing someone else benefits from what we have been through. 1999 taught me not to waste my pain but to allow it to drive me to do something to help others who are suffering. If you know someone who is struggling under their circumstances, would you share this with them?
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